we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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