Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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