i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
