the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize