so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
