yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
