No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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