I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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