super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
