Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
