You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
