I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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