Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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