do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
