Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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