What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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