It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
