Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
