well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
