Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Randomize
