the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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