yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
