I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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