Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Randomize
