I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
The ass gains better be worth it
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