I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
