I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
