well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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