I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Randomize
