I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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