I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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