Soap is not a condiment
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
