Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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