everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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