Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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