at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
