dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
