I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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