youre lurking in front of me
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
