im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
