Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
My cat gives me a boner
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
