the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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