He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
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