Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
