the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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