Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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