It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
