So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
high people should be assigned attendants
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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