So drunk its hurt
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
