i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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